They make you change without hurting your self-esteem. 84. After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says W T F. 15. Not everyone has to like me. - Jack London. Nothing, they just waved. What is Mozart doing right now? I am healthy, I am wealthy, I am hot!, 14. Life is becoming easier and less serious. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. 11. I know the best time to make fun. Give your body time to absorb the positivity and let go of negative thoughts. If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. Friday Affirmations. Ted Turner. Making everyone angry, piece of cake. Ive got three bones. 181. I am strong and getting stronger every day. 151. Why was six scared of seven? I can always be fatter. 7. I said no to drugs, but they just wouldnt listen. Adventures in Dating: Memoirs of a Single Mom, Adventures in Dating: Memoirs of Midlife Relationships, Did you know that having a good sense of humor is very important when it comes to social interaction? It will have a positive effect on your mind and body, and form an association between affirmations and a happy feeling. Its what it is supposed to be, dont overthink and let it go. Im going to stand outside, so if anybody asks for me, Im outstanding. Walking into a room and then forgetting why I am here is my daily cardio. Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. 241. 9. I didnt give you the finger, you earned it. But you can always be immature. 83. It can get you out of a tight corner and people who lack a sense of humor cannot do. If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button. 20. 94. Laughter keeps us from taking life too seriously, and life certainly does everything it can to ensure that we take it too seriously. When you fall, I will be there to catch you with love. Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. If youre hotter than me, then that means Im cooler than you. Best friends eat your food. My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. I can do this. If youre just starting your affirmation journey, you might feel skeptical at first. I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case were having cake. Rather, the goal is to help kids recognize the truth, in situations and in themselves. 74. Enjoy! He who laughs last didnt get it. It may look like Im doing nothing, but in my head, Im quite busy. Friends buy you food. 53. Need to send some positive energy your way? - Kyle Chandler. Im in desperate need of a 6-month vacation, twice a year. 31. When I was in high school I had two favorite subjects, lunch and recess. I teach my kids good things in sarcastic ways. Home: Where I can look ugly and not care. The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do. George Burns, 253. 214. I am passing all the things and hardships with a smile. I have no time to worry; I have to be awesome. You definitely dont want to kill the vibe by throwing a bad joke out there! 179. Im multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. When you feel terrified (without your safety being in danger): 5. Youre just gonna feel embarrassed for a minute or two and then it will be over. Dont make me laugh, Im trying to be mad at you. 165. 79. I feed my spirit. 57. Bill Murray If I am willing to go back to bed when I wake up, I will go and make up the bed. I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status. The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. I enjoy taking long romantic walks, to the fridge. 214. 45. I'm a peli-can! Whether its because of a bad breakup or just feeling really down, there are ways to look on the bright side and come out on top. I did it! 267. Make the statements about yourself and for yourself. It may feel useless but just get into it. A backbone. Always follow your heart, but remember to bring your brain along. 9. Your email address will not be published. I ve had great success using daily affirmations for my personal development. 168. Before using these amusing affirmations, you should believe in your sense of humor. I am already great, and I am yet to reach my full potential. "A moment of patience in a moment of anger saves you a hundred moments of regret. You never know what you have, until you clean your closet. Work smarter, not for owning iPhones, but for not fearing their breaks. Ken Dodd, 255. 131. 147. - Catherine Pulsifer. Not a peli-cant. People wait all week for Friday, all year for summer, all life for happiness. 119. Im sorry, but thats just the way I am. 37. 7. Today I was a hero. I am so f*cking awesome. Today is a great day. Today I will embrace the poop. 44. Dont drink to forget me, youll end up seeing me double. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wifes mother. I like expensive things because I learn the act of taking care from them. What happens to a frogs car when it breaks down? If you have crazy friends you have everything youll ever need. Also read: 50+ Powerful Positive Affirmations For Exams. Not saying I hate you, but if your face was on fire and I had a glass of water, Id drink it. All you need is love. 19. You never know what you have, until you clean your closet. 265. With a cowculator. Henny Youngman, 246. 107. To anybody I hurt this year, I just wanna say you deserve it. When shit hits the fan at work, I turn it into fertilizer. Nobody gets out alive anyway. Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door. 106. 130. My silence spoke a thousand words, but you never heard them. They log in. Never let your best friends get lonely, keep disturbing them. Heres a giant list of funny affirmations to help you relax your mind with a little humor when youre stressed. I am capable of rewriting my grievances and transforming my fears. Whether youre saying the affirmations aloud or writing them down, laughing along will only strengthen their effect. May life man not be perfect, but Im blessed., 13. Im multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time. I draw from my inner strength and light. Remember that the effects of affirmations are no laughing matter, so make sure your voice is heard. Hello little voice inside my head, please just shut up., 14. My chins are a stairway to heaven. Billy Wilder. P.D. 95. Who says nothing is impossible? I am grateful for that time. Snowballs. Next up is a collection of funny affirmations that will make you love yourself more. Just like every Monday does on Earth. 11. You might enjoy: Affirmations: 13 Answers You Should Know When and How to Let Them Know, How To Cheer Yourself Up When Feeling Down, 5 Things To Discuss With Your Partner Before Marriage, Funny Positive Affirmations For Self-Esteem, 50+ Powerful Positive Affirmations For Exams, 70+ Positive Affirmations For Teens From Parents. Short Positive Daily Affirmations. Life doesnt have any hands, but it can sure give you a slap sometimes. 156. 6. But sometimes affirmations may not work. You can make friends and have good relationships if you believe in your sense of humor and fill your mind with funny and positive thoughts. Subscribe To Our Newsletter! 133. And a funny bone. Laughter has always been lauded for its therapeutic effects. Can February march? Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up. Stop texting me in the middle of texting you, now I have to change my text. Laughter also has a social aspect, as its the perfect way to bond with people. 144. Maybe Monday doesn't like you either. The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. Oscar Wilde, 5. 64. It will warm you twice unknown. Dear Monday, my mama doesn't like you and she likes everyone. 276. 183. It has nothing new to tell you. Socrates. 8. 275. My boss is like a baby, screams and wakes me up every half hour. Bill Murray People say you cant live without love, but I think oxygen is more important. "Age is of no importance unless you're a cheese.". Remember, What consumes your mind, controls your life., 7. "I make people laugh, whether it's with me or at me.". Im thinking like a proton, always positive. Ill keep going forward even if my pants tear off. No, but April may. 158. Are these genes in your jeans or are you just happy to see me? You can simply try out one of our funny options, or think of affirmations that best match your sense of humor. Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it. My imaginary friend thinks he has problems. Then perhaps youd find value in these articles on how to write affirmations and the benefits of affirmations. If you think nobody cares if youre alive, try missing a couple of car payments. Affirmations can either be written down, spoken out loud, or visualized in the form of a conversation between money and you. 201. 45. Smile today, tomorrow could be worse. What do you call a bear with no teeth? Funny positive affirmations do work. Not everyone has good taste. Smiles are contagious, be a carrier. Positive affirmations aren't about tricking kids into mentally looking at life with eyes that only see what they want to see. Always remember youre unique, just like everyone else. I breathe in and out. 122. 1. No matter how bad it gets Im always rich when I go to the dollar store. A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours. Life does a pretty good job of keeping us stressed and worried, we dont need our internal dialogue to pile on too. I'm sorry, I have to quickly disable alarm level brown. Because so many kings and queens have been reigning there. Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now thats confusing. 139. 269. .People who enjoy making other people laugh are also known to be more detail oriented. Self-love is the greatest middle finger of all time., See also: 210 Killer Self Love Captions For Instagram To Lift You Up. 43. Stay focused and consistent, and youll start noticing the healing powers of humor and fun. 7. 97. I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. 3. 80 Soren Kierkegaard Quotes On Love, Life And Philosophy, Top 90 Martin Luther King Jr. Feel free to share with friends and family on Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, WhatsApp, Twitter and more to motivate them every morning. Let me know in the comments section down below! How do astronomers organize a party? Nobody is listening, but you still feel embarrassed. I never apologize. No matter how bad it gets Im always rich when I go to the dollar store. 24. I can always think of something funny to say. I am Ananya, a professional speaker and I love motivating people and inspiring them to pursue their dreams. 184. Dont drink to forget me, youll end up seeing me double. For the best seat in the house, youll have to move the dog. "If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you.". Then you stand in front of the mirror, take a deep breath in, open your mouthwait, this is funny. So, watch your words, restructure your thoughts, and stay positive if you want to see a change in your life. 239. I could agree with you, but then wed both be wrong. Seeing a spider in my room isnt scary. I am intelligent. Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but Im still going to keep looking. Inspiring Quotes About Life "Here, we like to keep you inspired by showing you beautiful words of wisdom based . Its scary when it disappears. 213. I rescued some beer that was trapped in a bottle. Bowling Alley: Please be quiet. With time, I have started to value more time. 99. I only check my voicemail to get rid of the annoying little icon. Because their teacher told them it was a piece of cake. You can use affirmations to alleviate pressure in highly stressful scenarios, like taking an exam or going to a job interview. You might enjoy: Affirmations: 13 Answers You Should Know. 157. 197. How can you not like someone who can make you laugh? I can believe in myself for 5 minutes., 2. 22. It was created to do amazing things. 100. Get help beating negative thinking by reciting positive affirmation every day. 112. The only power you have is the word no. 231. Bill Gates. To the guy who created imaginary numbers in math: I hate you. Im not arguing, Im just telling you why youre wrong. If you cant remember my name, just say chocolate and Ill turn around.. If you are looking for a way to get more laughs in your day, try some of these funny affirmations to build your self-esteem. I am stepping out of my comfort zone, no matter how small the step. It can get you out of a tight corner and people who lack a sense of humor cannot do. If the funny affirmations that Ive put together dont break your cool, then feel free to throw on a comedy special on Netflix or Youtube when you feel stressed. Granted, it can be challenging to write affirmations, especially if you havent done it before. I'm having a staff meeting.". East. Dont forget that you get 24 hours, even on your worst day. can help you become successful in whatever you choose to do in life. Sincerely, yourself. 247. I am constantly growing and improving. God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. First, the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. If you were able to believe in Santa Claus for 8 -9 years, you can believe in yourself for at least 5 minutes. I may not know karate, but I know crazy and Im not afraid to use it. If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button. 134. I am lazier after accomplishing the motive. Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up. 6. I see the funny side of life more and more. Walter Bagehot Im not weird, Im just limited edition. Hence, avoid using past or future tenses. You can be positive and yet be funny and easy-going. It has the power to add levity to our daily challenges. For the best seat in the house, youll have to move the dog. 127. My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. When they go away, its a brighter day. I love my body. With great power comes an even greater electricity bill. I have Alzheimers bulimia, first I eat everything in sight and then I forget to puke. 78. 146. Funny affirmations for self-esteem are one way you can boost your mood in just minutes! My jokes do. 221. 130. I dont need a psychologist to dig into my personal life and ask me about all of my secrets, thats what my friends are for!, 13. 89. And get over it. 170. 174. Common sense is like deodorant, those who need it the most never use it. Why was six scared of seven? 3. So life is not always "All The Way Up", I guess. 92. 153. Laughter brings me closer to people. 5. And one of the fundamental truths in life is that they will make . Build a bridge. Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey. People only rain on my parade because they are jealous of my sun and tired of their shade., 14. I have a new hairstyle today, its called I tried. I dont think thats a coincidence. Well, life isn't just about glitz and glamour nor rainbows and butterflies. The thing is, I am still getting ready. Im laughing at the confusion and smiling through the tears. Let these funny affirmation quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day. 187. 79. My windows arent dirty, my dog is painting. 76. A bargain is something you dont need at a price you cant resist. I love the moment when the coffee kicks in and I realize what an adorable badass I am going to be today. Say your affirmations slowly and clearly. You can only be young once. The only relationship I have is with my Wifi. 213.
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